Park
-Hey, do you want to go to a park?
-Okay
-Well which park do you want to go to?
-Em, how about the biggest park in the city?
-What […]

Read: An Irish Conversation in the American Midwest #24 »

Multiplication
-The thought of him procreating is a horrible one
-What’s procreation, Peader?
-It’s probably best if I show you, Maura
See Other Stuff Not A Million Miles Away:
   • […]

Read: Irish Conversation in a Dublin Pub #40 »

Telephone Directory
-Hello?
-Hello. This is your local telephone company. This is a courtesy phone call to see if you received our new telephone directory. Press or […]

Read: An Irish Conversation in the American Midwest #23 »

Of The Morning
-What did he say it was called?
-’The Lark of the Morning’
-Oh
-And then he made a joke
-I like that
-He said “or sandwiches at 4am”
-‘The […]

Read: Irish Conversation in the American Midwest #23 »

Nice Guy
-You seem like a nice guy; I’m going to give you my number and you can call me so we can go for a […]

Read: Irish Conversation in the American Midwest #22 »

Complaining
-How are things with you?
-Oh, I can complain
-Please don’t
-So you don’t really want to know how things are with me then?
-No I do, but I […]

Read: Irish Conversation in a Dublin Pub #39 »

Seat
-You don’t look comfortable down there. Do you need a seat?
-No. I need a new pair of pants
See Other Stuff, Kinda Related and Kinda Not:
   • […]

Read: Irish Conversation in Dublin Pub #38 »

Here’s an experience I had in Kansas City this week that I’ve never had in Ireland.
-You know my name, but you will call me […]

Read: Kansas City Fast Food, Fast Car and Fast Woman »

The Dead
-Ya know, I never liked that Slobodan Milosevic
-Would ya stop, didn’t yer mother ever tell you to never speak ill of the dead?
-Not my […]

Read: Irish Conversation in a Dublin Pub #37 »

Safety
-D’ya remember that wan with the hair?
-Not yer wan singing olé, olé?
-I had my wicked way with her last night
-Where?
-In the car
-What did you use […]

Read: Irish Conversation in a Dublin Pub #36 »

Education
-Did your mother teach you about the birds and the bees?
-No. She taught me about the Byrds and the Beatles
-Cool! She taught you about music
-No. […]

Read: Irish Conversation in a Dublin Pub #35 »

Hey! ‘Tis Wednesday in Missouri

Read: Music, in KC, MO, the Irishish sort »

Convenience Store
-Is that all for you, partner?
-Yes, thank you
-Well this don’t seem like the kind of place a man would come just to get milk
-It’s […]

Read: Irish Conversation in the American Midwest #21 »

Lights
-Are you going into town to watch Dame Vera Lynn turn the Christmas lights on?
-No, but I wouldn’t mind going into town to watch the […]

Read: Irish Conversation in a Dublin Pub #34 »

NOTE: This post has been nominated for the Irish Blog Awards 2007 - in the Most Humorous Post category.
And by nominated I mean long-listed.
-Hi
-Hello?
-It’s me, […]

Read: A Kansas City Phone Call To An Irish Mother »

Taking Your Turn
-I want you to drive now
-I’m sorry, but I can’t drive
-It’s okay; you can
-But I can’t
-You can; it’s my car
-It doesn’t matter who […]

Read: Irish Conversation in the American Midwest #20 »

Restaurant
-Where are you going?
-Where are YOU going?
-To the restaurant; it’s right there
-But the car is down here
-But the restaurant is just there
-But the car is […]

Read: An Irish Conversation in the American Midwest #19 »

Feebly I reach a tired hand up to my desk, where I find several scraps of paper.
And a tape recorder.
Fearful of hearing sentences hurled at […]

Read: A Chat With The Plain People Of The Midwest »

Number One
-Do you know the way when you visit the little boys room?
-Indeed and I do, and I’m the only one who does
-Well do you […]

Read: Irish Conversation in a Dublin Pub #33 »

Christmas
-Do you guys have Christmas in Ireland?
See Other Irish Conversations (some even longer than this):
   • Leaves Changing Colour
   • Guns, the Americans, and the English
   • African-Americans

Read: Irish Conversation in the American Midwest #18 »